Giants fans UNITE!

As we sit 2 hours from the first pitch of the World Series I can't help but chuckle at the SF Giants FEVER that has hit this city. HECK, this half of our STATE. Northern California is starving for a champion, for a Cinderella story. It has been a few years since any of our major sports franchises have reached the big one. Both the Oakland Raiders and the Giants made it to their respective "big ones" in 2002, before that we had the glory years of the Sacramento Kings. I was just a kid when the 49ers were in their hayday. I hear rumors of the Oakland A's being good once, at least every time you get in an argument with an A's fan they say "championship" because that is all they have to say....maybe this year we'll have a little something to throw back at 'em!

Anyway, my point WAS, even those who wouldn't have considered themselves Giants fans, or even really baseball fans have jumped on the Giants winning the World Series bandwagon. Typically, I am not cool with fare whether fans partaking in the glory of a winning team that they have not lived and died with all season. HOWEVER, in this case, I am going to say "GIANTS FANS: UNITE!"

The Gigantes need all the juju they can get and you know what? It is freakin fun to see post after post on facebook on a game day. It is fun to see people with their colors on, people wearing hats and eye black and girls with cute little girl Giants shirts on. I know that I can barely concentrate at work today, hence this blog post...I can't wait to get home tonight and hopefully watch them take Game 1. If they don't, well...tomorrow will be even MORE important. This is our year, I can feel it. Can't you feel it?

I have a fever and the only cure is A WORLD SERIES RING!!

Reflections: Looking back at 6 months of marital bliss

Not to get mushy on you but today marks 6 months of marriage for the Haynes'. I have never been a "monthly anniversary" celebrator....I just don't see the point, but today I have some thoughts I want to pen down, or I suppose, in this case type down.

For anyone who has known Derek and I any length of time, you know that not only did we date for YEARS ( I mean, like a lot of years) before we got married, but we also did not live together before we got married. I think that in this day and especially for our age, that is pretty rare. However, I think that has made these last six months that much sweeter for us.

There is something to be said for the discovery of your partner in day to day life. I didn't know exactly what Derek's habits were early in the morning when getting ready for work. I didn't know how he slept every night, how he snoozes his alarm 2-3 times each morning and how he turns on the shower before he shaves his face at the sink.

Derek didn't know that I never snooze my alarm (or maybe he did because I make disparaging comments about snoozing all the time) that I apparently talk nonsense in my sleep (I didn't know that either) or that I throw elbows when I sleep (I guess we need a bigger bed).

These are all non-starter parts of our lives (except the elbow throwing, that is serious) but I am just making a point; there are so many things that even 8 years of dating didn't teach us about one another.

Something I didn't expect about living together? How sweet our evenings together would be. How fun it is to be home making dinner for Derek when he gets home from a long day. How appreciative he is when he comes home to a clean house and clean laundry. How even though I am not the greatest cook in the world, he loves it when I try and make something new.

Things that are special to me after 6 months of marriage:
When he brings me a cup of coffee in the bathroom each morning while I get ready before he leaves in the morning.
When I wake up with an Afro of a hair-do he makes a silly comment like, "Stay back boys, she's all mine"
When I cook dinner, he races to the kitchen to clean up the dishes after we eat.
On the rare nights that I get home later than he does, there are always comfy clothes laid out on the bed for me and a glass of wine poured.
That most weekends we do the grocery shopping and the laundry together.
That he sends me random "I love you darlin" texts during the day
That whenever I am gone from the house, he sends me "What are you doing? What is your status?" texts...
That he always calls when he is on his way home
That whenever I walk in the door he says, "There's my wife"
That we still can laugh together about the dumbest things...like me falling, hitting my knee on the coffee table, or him making a "law situation" out of everything
Our dinner date nights together
Our yogurt runs
The fact that we can still do things with our friends, separately
When we do things with our friends together
That we make time to get together with our parents and my brothers family
That he is my greatest supporter and he encourages me to step out in faith into uncharted territories and follow my dreams
That he make me a better person, every day
That together we try and be a blessing to those around us

There is no one I would rather face trials with, no one who makes me happier, no one that I feel safer with, no one who can make me laugh more and no one who I would rather spend the rest of my life with than Derek. I love you Derek.

Being a better friend

I was inspired this week by a blog post I read that challenged women, in particular, to do a better job of understanding each other in each other's different walks of life. It struck a chord with me because I have friends in various stages of life; single, dating, married, married with kids, single with kids, divorced, divorced with kids....

Every person has their own unique situation and their own life circumstances. No one has a full understanding of another person's life circumstances and frankly, it seems sometimes that no one cares to try and figure it out. After reading that blog post I had to stop and ask myself, "Do I do a good job of being understanding of other people's challenges? Do I reach out to my friends even when they don't reach out to me?"

I was ashamed to answer NO to both questions...at least most of the time. It is so easy sometimes to just hang with the friends who are like me; in a relationship or married and kid free. How can I possibly understand what it is like to have children? How can I possibly understand what it is like to be a SINGLE parent? Well, I could certainly do a better job of offering friendship to my friends who are in that place in their life.

So what if they are busy? So what if I am busy? Does that exempt me from picking up the phone and giving them a call? Does that mean I cannot go to their house when they cannot go out for the evening?

Today I made the first step in a new resolution to be a better friend and to make an effort to understand what life is like outside of the bubble I live in. One of my friends who has children invited me to come watch her daughter's soccer game. In the past I would have likely declined because my Saturdays are precious time to me. I either need that time to run errands, house clean or simply spend time to Derek if neither one of us is working.

However, I realized that the time requirement would only be about an hour, I loved playing soccer as a kid and I love my friends. I would have time to see Derek when I got home. She was making an effort to reach out to me, which she did not have to do. Was it so hard for me to meet her half way and come to the place she was already going to be? I could see how SHE spent HER Saturdays.

So I went. I am glad I did. It was nice to watch the kids run around, it was nice to see a friend I don't see often and it was nice to take part in the lives of her children. We may not be as close as we once were, but I will always be there for her and I want her to know that. It isn't likely that we will ever be walking step by step in life again. However, I don't think that means that we can't take a walk in this life together every once in a while.

There aren't many friends that you can hang onto for a lifetime so when you find one, do everything in your power to understand them, to love them and to reach out to them. Time is precious, but friendship supersedes all time.

I could use a little humor

Seems like work goes through the same 'ol phases week after week...I'll have a good week at work followed up by a frustrating, stressful week. One week I am loving my job, the next week I am searching Craig's list for a new opportunity...

Needless to say, I could use a good laugh...unfortunately it comes at the expense of myself...of course.

So the last several weeks I have acquired 5 or 6 bites on my body. They are either spider bites or some sort of bug (dare I say "bed bug"). Now, because of these bites, I get into bed and lie awake feeling like I have spiders of bugs crawling in my sheets. I DO have restless leg syndrome, which cause me to feel like I have ants constantly crawling up and down my legs, but this is different, TRUST ME.

I realize this is irrational and unlikely....however, where did the bites come from?! My husband is so ashamed of me...and I think that he thinks I am going insane...I check my sheets before I get in them and they appear harmless, but now I am not sleeping at night....what am I going to do?

Welcome Fall, I've been waiting for you

I absolutely LOVE this time of year. I love the chill in the air, I love scarves, gloves, hats, boots, jeans and blankets. I love hot tea, fires, warm beds and hot showers.

I am ready to travel to Apple Hill and buy pie, cider and apples (maybe even wine taste??) I can't wait to drive up to Tahoe and see the snow, maybe even ski a little.

Falling leaves, overcast skies and a drizzle in the air...these are a few of my favorite things. How can anyone not love Fall in Northern California?

My favorite fall activities:

• Apple Hill
• Wine Tasting
• Walking (don't judge me)
• Motorcycle riding
• Watching Football
• This year: Watching the SF Giants in the post-season ;)
• Trying new baking recipes
• Also this year: Moving into my first house

Embarking on a new adventure

Well, this blog was the first step in what I hope to be a long-lived adventure of writing extravaganzas! I can't say I have found a brand new love of writing, because I have always loved it, but I suppose that I could say I have found new inspiration, new support and a fresh wave of courage to take a step I have always wanted to.

I am going to see if I can expand on this writing thing and take it to a new level. What that MEANS exactly, I am not sure, but it does mean I am going to hang myself out there a bit, open myself up to be rejected, criticised, turned away....and maybe... accepted as a good writer.

I am currently exploring potential avenues to take my new found courage and seeing what options are available to me such as online writing contests, freelance opportunities, story submissions etc...

Perhaps even one day I shall write a book...would you read it?

I know that I may never find success, but I also know that I love to write and that even the act of writing is love to me and that is enough. If I can find success in the process of doing something I already love, then I have succeeded twice. If I don't try, than I will never know and I may miss perhaps the greatest opportunity of all.

After I am gone...Let It Be Said

After I am gone from this world let it be said...

That I loved without limits
That I served without thanks
That I listened without talking
That I hugged without knowing
That I prayed without ceasing

After I am gone from this world let it be said...

That I showed compassion to those who were without
That I heard the cries of those who couldn't speak
That I gave of myself when there was nothing in return
That I looked for the lost so that they might be found
That I listened to my heavenly Father in my darkest days

After I am gone from this world let it be said...

That I was a friend to the friendless
That I was a lighthouse to the drifting
That I was hope to the hopeless
That I was joy in midst of the pain
That I shared pain in midst of the sorrow

As I walk into the arms of my Father in heaven let it be said...

That I loved deeply, laughed often and lived life as God intended me to live it. That I loved my neighbor as myself and I loved God with my whole heart, my whole mind, with all my soul and with all my strength.

Amen

Seeing things from the wrong perspective

Perspective is a funny thing, it can drastically alter the opinion and memory of a situation or an event versus someone else at the same event or in the same situation who saw it from a different perspective.

Today I had a big event at work...The "Super Bowl" of events at one of my radio stations as my GM likes to put it. For the first time the details and planning of this event fell squarely and solely on my shoulders. Have you ever been in one of those situations where if it goes well it is a win for the whole group but if it goes badly it is your fault and only your fault? That is this event...

There were other people involved with various aspect of selling sponsorships into the event and another person in charge of sending out invitations and getting people TO the event and my job was the make the event happen.

So the big day comes, I am awake at 4:45am...I think I jumped out of bed the second I heard my alarm go off...I was just waiting for it. I rushed through my morning prep, grabbed my coffee and flew out the door. As I entered my event room I was struck by the eerie silence that signaled I was the first to arrive...I knew I would be, but I had hoped I would be wrong and another co-worker would meet me there and offer support...That was just the beginning of a series of views I took from the wrong perspective today.

As people began to arrive, co-workers, sponsors and our guests of honor, our Pastors, I was rushing around answering questions, putting out "fires" finishing off last minute details, it seemed to me that every person in the room was incompetent except me...wp(wrong perspective)

The clock was creeping near 8am and our seats were not as full as I would have liked them...where were all the people? I looked around at our sponsors...a few had frowns on their faces, which immediately screamed to me that they were PISSED and obviously I was to blame...I saw our corporate representative whispering in the corner with our General Manager, obviously they were talking about when to fire me and hire in my replacement...WP

Finally the program starts and I can take a reprieve from my idiotic thoughts, sit down and survey the scene for real.

• Our seats were nearly full
• Our sponsors (by the way, there were more sponsors than EVER at this event) had nice looking displays and good information to offer people
• The food was being distributed on time and quickly
• Our entertainment was preforming in the background and created a nice ambiance
• Our Pastors were chatting with their table mates, drinking coffee, eating food and smiling
• There didn't appear to be a fire in sight....

As our event progressed and wrapped up and I once again sprang into action I was stopped again and again by co-workers, Pastors and sponsors who complimented me, our event and said they would see us next year...so why was I so negative? If I had been a casual observer, say, a Pastor who attended our event, everything was P-E-R-F-E-C-T...no problems and not a hitch in the program. They got a goodie bag, a free breakfast, a good teaching, a chance to meet and greet fellow Pastors and, if they wanted, an opportunity to expose themselves to the useful resources that our sponsors were offering.

So I examined myself and asked, "If the people who this event is intended for are happy, content and taken care of, why am I so intent on finding fault around every corner?" I determined that I was viewing our event from the wrong perspective, as the "event planner", which is, of course, what I do but doesn't give me an excuse to tear down the good in our event.

First of all, immediately getting bummed that no one was there when I arrived was irrational. I arrived 45 minutes before I had asked my staff to arrive, what did I expect? Pre-determining that every person in the room was incompetent because they needed to ask me questions...slightly over the top. If you recall, I am the EVENT PLANNER...I had all the details, all the answers and all the specifics...I suppose it was only natural that people were going to ask me questions if I expected them to help me do ANYTHING. Also, I am pretty sure our GM and Corporate Rep were NOT planning my demise as I had envisioned...

Anyone who attended our event today will remember the event as a well put together, relaxing and rejuvenating time.

I already mentioned that the event turned out great and I am vastly relieved...but at the same time, it reveled a lot to me about myself and a bit about what I need to change in my life. I don't need to turn into Polly Sunshine and only view life through rose-colored glasses, but I do need to realize that not everyone is stupid, not everything is against me, I am not ALWAYS working alone, sometimes things do turn out OK and if I let things play out, typically they work out alright...

Goodbye Debby Downer, you are not welcome here anymore

Lord, please forgive me, it has been 7 days since my last entry

I really fell off the blog wagon this week, I apologize, being that I know SO many of you count on my informative, witty and often emotionally charged entries. {{Sarcasm duley noted I hope}} I will try and not let that happen again. This week has been crazy, in a work related way and when I get home at night, all I want to do is fall into a deep slumber...

That said, my fingers have been itching for the opportunity to release some pent up aggression and so I comply to their stubbornness...it is funny though, I am not even sure what I want to say, but the simple act of putting my thoughts down on paper (even virtually) release such a joy in my spirit, that it almost doesn't matter!

My thoughts today though are swirling with controversy brought on by a conversation I recently had...it all comes down to this thought: Is what I do for a living what I am meant to be doing?

Please don't confuse "meant to be doing" with:

• Happy
• Satisfied
• Content
• Enjoyable
• Long-term

This isn't just a question I am asking myself, but a question I encourage you to ask yourself. I think that so many of us get caught doing whatever it is that we are doing for a living because...

• We have a degree in it


• It pays well


• We have been there too long to quit


• We don't want to burn a bridge


• It is too hard to start over


• We thought it was what we were "meant" to do

If we were all honest with ourselves I think we would admit that the number one reason we don't pursue our secret dreams is because we are plain scared that it won't work out and we don't believe enough in ourselves...furthermore we may not have the love and support of someone else who believes in us (maybe because you have never shared your REAL dreams with anyone close to you).

If bills were not a factor and you could do whatever you wanted to do with your life, what would you do? If you could get the schooling, get the training, find the right job, take that first step...what would you do in order to be happy every day when you go to work?

I challenge you, along with myself, to think about it...it may not be possible for everyone, because bills and money ARE a factor in life, and not everyone has access to schooling, training and unlimited job selection in order to pursue their dreams, but do you even know?

I think it is important for all of us to know what we want and what we would do if we had the opportunity. For some of us we'll get a chance to create that opportunity for ourselves. It is also important to delegate a person in your life that you can share your dreams with that can support you in your efforts to discover who is it that you are meant to be.

I am on a mission now, in the happiest and most content time in my life, to find out who I am meant to be. Will you join me?

God please don't let her snort tonight...

So tonight marks a little milestone in my relationship with Derek...I am attending my first official "work-function" with him and his co-workers...

I am fairly positive that he is WAY more nervous about it than I am. I think I am pretty funny, witty and easy to get along with on a night by night basis (I have often said I am not a generally friendly person, but I mean I don't just bring people into my inner circle for the fun of it). More importantly, I converse easily with strangers and I ALWAYS get along well with those who are significantly older than me, so I should be a hit with the partners!

I think his single worst fear is that I might laugh so hard that I snort...yes, SNORT out loud...Most of you have probably NEVER heard me do that because it does not happen often. In fact, it rarely happens in front of ANYONE other than Derek...Actually I think he makes it up...

Anyway, we'll see how it goes!! I think it will be fine and I am looking forward to it. After all, he married me fully knowing who I am and how I act and that eventually he would have to take me out in public...will he regret it tonight?

Who has the over?